Wo Shi Laowai – Wo Pa Shui

This Blog was Invented in Xi'an 5,000 Years Ago

Happy Nailing Jews To The Cross Day

Posted by MyLaowai on Friday, April 10, 2009

So Jesus walks into a hotel, marches straight up to the receptionist, hands over some pieces of wood and asks: “Can you put me up for a couple of nights?”

Sure, I’m going to Hell for that one. But to be fair on the guy, at least he didn’t have any bad habits, like biting his nails. The bad habits he left to his future wives, who were all Catholic for some reason.

Why exactly do we celebrate this barbaric tradition again…?


6 Responses to “Happy Nailing Jews To The Cross Day”

  1. justrecently said

    As long as it means two extra holidays, I’m asking no questions.

  2. Ned Kelly said

    Nah, you’re not going to Hell for that joke. If anything, you’ll earn a few hundred years off from Purgatory for it!

    My co-blogger Catherine and I are both Christians of very traditional churches, and we both believe “God is the Greatest Comedian”.

    And we believe Hell is a place where there’s no sense of humour at all.

    Therefore (and I really do mean this), I believe that in all probability, the soul of the late homosexual Monty Python member Graham Chapman is now a saint – or at least well on the way to sainthood – because he was a genius at understanding the joke of human nature and human existence, and he helped his fellow men to laugh about it.

    But by the same reasoning, I think the majority of China’s Central Propaganda Department will go straight to Hell, because they will never acknowledge how ridiculous they are.

  3. Ned Kelly said

    PS, when I enter Purgatory, I will request an apartment in Stalin’s neighbourhood, because I think he’d be a good conversationalist and good fun at parties. But as it’s Purgatory, the only wine we will have access to will be Great Wall.

    And I expect to have only one TV channel in Purgatory: CCTV-9.

    But if I wake up in the afterlife hearing the voices of Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton on a TV I can’t turn off, then I’ll know I’m in Hell.

  4. justrecently said

    Purgatory was invented in China 7,000 years ago. But only for foreign imperialists.

  5. Ned Kelly said

    JR, you might be right, in a funny way! :-)

    Meanwhile, here is my blog’s take on the meaning of Easter, which I believe can be shared even by “atheists” who love Mankind:


  6. justrecently said

    Orthodox Happy Easter to y’all, too…

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