Welcome To Red China
Posted by MyLaowai on Monday, December 10, 2007
Welcome To Red China
I first came to live in China back in 1992,
I thought I’d really like it, that I’d learn a thing or two.
I thought of Monks in orange robes sat up on a hill,
And how there weren’t no whores or hookers, and nobody popped pills.
I’d seen those lovely movies put out by the CCP
About how everyone was happy, and everyone was free,
And how the People were always diligent, and everyone was kind…
Then I got to immigration, and saw this great big sign:
Welcome to Red China:
Land of sawn-off savage cunts.
Our Women are cold-blooded monsters,
Our Men retarded runts.
We perch like bloody pigeons
And other stupid stunts.
Welcome to Red China:
Land of sawn-off savage cunts.
I went out to a restaurant, to find out what they eat:
Insect parts and rodent’s guts and fuckin’ chickens feet!
And they wash it down with ‘baijiu’ – gasoline more like,
It’s the kind of muck that’ll keep you up chundering all night.
As for the bloody music, it was sickly Canton-pop,
And they were always yipping yapping, they never bloody stopped!
The constant din and racket was doing in me head,
When this ugly hooker waitress turned to me and said:
Welcome to Red China:
Land of sawn-off savage cunts.
Our Women are cold-blooded monsters,
Our Men retarded runts.
We ride motorbikes on the footpath
And other stupid stunts.
Welcome to Red China:
Land of sawn-off savage cunts.
Anyone with any balls is sentenced to hard time.
The Chairman’s a bloody butcher, the CCP’s a herd of swine,
The Law is just a standing joke. Justice? I think I’ll pass,
And the Premier has his mouth connected to his arse.
I’ve been here more than fifteen years, it’s too late to go home –
I think the cancer’s got me in the stomach, lungs and bones,
And me nerves are all a shattered mess, and I’ve lost the will to live.
But with me final dyin’ breath this warning I will give:
Don’t come to Red China:
Land of sawn-off savage cunts.
The Women are cold-blooded monsters,
The Men retarded runts.
They always blame us foreigners
For all their stupid stunts.
So don’t come to Red China:
Land of sawn-off savage cunts.
rc said
Wow! Gilbert and Sullivan: Eat your hearts out!
BTW, 15 years?!? Dude!
East-West Station » China Bashing said
[…] thing you can say is that he doesn’t mince his words. But when I read the following “Comic Poem“, I kind of wished I […]