Wo Shi Laowai – Wo Pa Shui

This Blog was Invented in Xi'an 5,000 Years Ago

An Overdue Rant

Posted by MyLaowai on Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Guest Post

The Year of the Cow passed, but now…

Stampede Prompts Safety Calls
1/3/13 By WANG XIAODONG and JIN ZHU ( China Daily)

Redux: at 6am, the school kiddies (at an elementary school) needed to get their shit together for another long, arduous school day. They were locked in. Of course, because the gates are locked every night for their safety. We tell prisoners the same thing too. A handful died in the panic, another handful injured. Good start, shame there weren’t more eh? One-Child Policy enforcers would be happy to see this more often… Maybe then families could have more babies, so that they too could live short-assed lives…

Unfortunately, the d00d in charge forgot to open the door in the morning. Pissed? Whoring? Who knows, but certainly not discharging his duties. Pretty standard in the PRC actually…

Not only did the dumb shits who didn’t wake up cop any shit, but their boss didn’t either. Hey bosses, instead of drinking MaoTai with your peers, how about giving a fuck about your charges? NO. That will NEVER happen. Me first. Friends second. My work? Like, am I supposed to give a fuck? What the?

Now. The real problem. The gate was closed. Ok, a small problem. What was the real cause of the deaths? Chinese dumb-assed bitches want to climb to the top. Elbows. Knees. Push. Shove. Fight. Fuck you! etc. If they weren’t Chinese, they wouldn’t have died.

Forget targeting the politicians or leaders. How about you target your shit-assed culture. Stop shoving your way to the front, regardless of who is in the road. You only have your culture to blame, you buck-teethed, short-dicked morons. Yes yes – I watch you try to cross the road against the red light every day. No, I do not cry, when someone, just like you, RUNS YOU THE FUCK OVER.

“Similar accidents keep happening, exposing the deficiency in infrastructure and management in many schools,” a netizen wrote. No, you dickless wonders. It exposes a massive deficiency in your morals.

Go back and study Confucius a little more. Oh, you did. Ok, now stop repeating his lines and UNDERSTAND what he was saying. Ah, you can’t, you can only mouth the words, not actually do it. Welcome to China. And here is where it gets weird.

They blame the poor old teachers for their omnipresent cultural SHIT. “If teachers fail to maintain order, such accidents will be repeated”. No, you moronic cockroaches. If you Chinese keep failing to give a shit about the person next to you, this shit will happen every day, and does. It’s not the teachers, it’s the students’ dumb-assed mother-fucking parents and relatives who keep shoving themselves in front of anyone they can, that cause the problem.

Simple answer here: Learn some manners you uncivilised barbarian apes. oh shit me – that’s what you think of foreigners. Well, shit me sideways dickwads, is there a stampede in America killing students? No, just some poor-aiming shithead with an automatic weapon thinking it’s a perfectly good masturbatory replacement.

“School authorities should launch routine checks of security facilities, such as stair rails and lights, to eliminate potential hazards,”

HAHAHHAAHA. Yes, we have stairs, Yes, I could walk up and down them – but SO COULD A PEDAPHILIC RAPIST

It gets better – Let’s read on:

“Last year, the Ministry of Education urged all elementary and secondary schools across China to educate students on how to respond in an emergency to better protect themselves.
The schools were asked to map out their safe evacuation routes, taking into consideration the number of students, building layout and corridor width, the ministry said.”
That is all well and good, but did anyone ask them to map out where the fuck to go when their ‘uncle’ was too busy screwing a cheap whore to come and open the goddamn prison gate that keeps them locked in?

1.6 billion people and falling. Can’t fall quick enough for our liking.

– Da Bizzare

23 Responses to “An Overdue Rant”

  1. wolfe said

    As an ex-fire warden whose fire stair is clogged with refrigerators, old furniture, buckets, mops and neck-high lines of drying laundry, I look forward to some, for the love of god, please, any, enforcement of safety regulations, not just in schools but the places where people live, where it’s far more likely that a fire will start due to dodgy wiring or the 1/4″ of built-up kitchen grease on the rangehood catching fire…

  2. Jeff said

    Wolfe,…. you’re dreaming!

  3. fuck you foreigners said

    you hurting the feelling of the chinese the people !! fuck you lie foreigner ! u low people no culture like us the chunese ! mu must be beaten hard low people foreigners stupid people stupid foreigner !!! you think you the King ???? go to die !!!

    • Long Long Time Been Here said

      @ Fuck you! I think going to die is a very real possibility, all we have to do is try and get out down the stairs.

      • fuck you foreigners said

        yes ! our china is best and best stronger than you foreigners ! you need china or u go the down ! so stupid foregner u will die and china will is best culture ! you will be the chinese ! all your country ! u weak foreignrers! china is best and oldest and strong and better ! you not king ! !! chinese race more advanced then the you white trash stupid foreigners !! undertstand ????? fuck you !

      • Long Long Time Been Here said

        No I don’t understand, could you explain that again?

      • 0112337 said

        Tell me, LLTBH, why is a lady like you on this toxic site, the battleground of marginalized, awkward teenagers with raging hormones and old fools who don’t have better things to do?

      • Long Long Time Been Here said

        @0112337 Why, are you feeling lonely? I’m sure you can find company at one of the many tea houses littering the streets.

      • 0112337 said

        I…am lonely. That is the truth. All day long, I do nothing except work, work, work…There is so much I don’t know. Whoever thinks every rich person in the world live like the Kardashians or inherited their wealth should be shot. That bastard probably lived off of someone else’s hard work.

        Only God knows how much I wished I could take the time out and go seek a nice girl, go to the movies with her, kiss her, and to see her smile, and do what a normal guy does. But I simply don’t have the time to make that kind of commitment to someone I truly love and respect.

        Not wishing to hurt her, by not being able to give her the adequate attention, I have to be lonely. It’s sad. And that is part of the reason why I come here…to this trash bin, hovering between the ridiculous and the insane, while drunk and depressed many times over.

        I have grand aspirations, and fueled by my ambition, I am forever battling myself, trying to accomplish my lofty goals, but many times it feels like running on a hamster wheel and believe me, I do ask myself many times over if these are all worthwhile. In 90 years we are all dust, so shouldn’t we do something Good for the world which the world will remember us by? Like Einstein. Pardon me if I don’t care what you think.

        When I am done with everything I set out to do, I plan to get a farm in a warm country, by the sea, away from everyone else. I will be a farmer, a fisherman, and a village teacher. Maybe a doctor too! I will spend the last of my days talking to my dog, in peace.

        Oh, and also doing drugs, when I turn 85.

        I will do EVERY kind of drug. EVERY KIND.

      • 0112337 said

        And I am sorry for my rude remarks toward you earlier.

        I was 100 kms in on the side of angry.

      • Long Long Time Been Here said

        You’re forgiven!

  4. 0112337 said



    And the comedy continues…

    The clowns have moved on from doing the too-de-li-loo to juggling live dynamites.

    Get your popcorn folks! The real kicker is still yet to come!!

  5. 0112337 said

    You Laowais are right about one thing. Chinese people, especially those that just came from the villages, do smell. My God, I was on the Beijing subway today during rush hour, and those of you who have been here know the new German designed metros have a tunnel ventilation system where wind travels through all the cars at once. It’s a gas chamber.

    I was downwind today from a wild eyed, medieval teethed, oily, red face peasant…a sturdy, iron peasant, a truly wholesome fellow that could probably down 20 white buns in one meal and spit his phlegm 20 meters with high velocity. He’s got a haircut that would be more closely associated with down syndrome, and to top it all, this beast clearly didn’t bathe for weeks. The warm, putrid smell of dirty oily hair, sticky, crusty human flesh, overeating induced, intestinal rotting shit, sour smell of rotten cabbages, stale cigarettes, baijiu, garlic, old urine, and weeks old sweat culminated together in a…veritable…solid wall of death. It came so strong downwind I was wincing as I endured the half hour ride. That peasant accompanied me all along and was looking at me too! Snickering. Yes, that stinking fucker was laughing, trying to understand why I showed so much suffering. He fenced himself in with more bags than his whole family’s bodyweight combined, and looked like he would take advantage of everything at the first opportunity. This guy’s quick, I tell you. He might not be educated, but man, if there’s anything free, he is the kind that will tap it like fly on shit.

    Oh, and I am an optimist, a very tolerant person in real life that tries to show mercy to the poor and disadvantaged. But my God, where did all these peasants come from?? I thought the wild mountains hid them away and cut them off from the main roads…There weren’t this many provincial animals 20 years ago. We native Beijingers, unlike these animals, care about cleanliness. I miss those days when we Beijingers actually owned our city.

    How I will survive the summer is a question at this point. I will probably get the best chemical warfare prevention mask available. I saw a Soviet WWII chemical warfare gas mask on sale in Amazon for less than 50 dollars, I think I will get that and prepare myself for the onslaught…

    If anybody stares, I will point to their armpit, mouth, shirt, and hair.

    • Jeff said

      Sounds like you just described the average Beijing supermodel!
      Second-hand garlic encrusted hairy armpits soaked in a sweaty salty piquant sauce, Hmmmmm.
      Something my cat would love. A real cats dinner ;-)

      peasants hmmm more like Zombies.

      I pity them,frying their brains on bowls of baijiu resulting in dementia. Just think theres about one billion of these just in this country.

      Yep theres too many many people in China al right.

  6. 0112337 said

    Other than my previous point about the fundamental difference in first reaction; where you automatically judge everything foreign as potentially evil, whereas Chinese people welcome foreigners, I have another theory…an empirical one.

    Chinese people are very rational when dealing with money, but quite irrational, emotional, childish, and often confused when dealing with everyday matters.

    You “Westerners” or white people, are the exact opposite. Many of you are quite irrational when dealing with money, but quite rational, clear thinking, and surprisingly logical, wise/mature, when dealing with everyday matters. So wise, that Chinese people call you Lao-wais, or old foreigners, foreigners who look and behave like older people.

    This I attribute to Christianity in your case, which taught you to be philanthropic, and hence most of you were never too good with money as compared to…your Jews, who had better training with banking and the concept of “interest” for at least 600 years.

    For Chinese people, things evolved into the way it is more…out of necessity. Since the culture is agrarian, it is communal, which means pillaging and plundering has never as deep a mark in the Chinese experience. And given that resources have always been scarce, after 3,000 years of forced micro-economic planning, every Chinese that survived were naturally selected to be excellent economists. Thus, other than the Jews, nobody else in this world can beat Chinese people in money management. The HongKongers, who are of Guangdong stock, are the best examples of this point. Those greedy little fuckers live for money and nothing else.

  7. 0112337 said

    See Little B, why do the real Americans not post on your blog? Because they know I can and will fucking END them, because I know what’s going down, what shenanigans these farmers are cooking at the highest levels, in their country, so they do the smart thing by not playing along.

    That’s why they only got the blunt end of the Asset Backed Securities shaft, and you guys, the Europeans, got the sharp end. Also why now, under Powa Nigga, shuga daddy Big Man Bernanke, they got doped up enough to stand up while you guys are still fumbling.

    It’s called being SMART. That’s S-M-A-R-T.

    Never, ever, underestimate the unorthodox, wily intelligence of conniving farmers. They don’t think the same way like the rest of us, but together they think alike. American farmers, Chinese farmers, Greek farmers, Italian farmers. Farmers all think along the same lines, have similar values, and behave similarly.

    This I am very much convinced.

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