Wo Shi Laowai – Wo Pa Shui

This Blog was Invented in Xi'an 5,000 Years Ago

It’s [Fact] Friday!

Posted by MyLaowai on Friday, February 20, 2009

Today’s fact is:

Fact! Grass was invented in China.

It was during a visit to the outlying regions of the Empire (which historically and since ancient times inseparably included Hawaii, California, and New Zealand), that Emperor Shu-ting Sum-yung-gai noticed that the local food sources (known to the barbarian peoples outside the Empire as ‘horses’) has very little to eat. He therefore set about inventing something that would enable these ‘horses’ to grow fatter and more delicious. After much painstaking research, he came up with what he called G’rass. It wasn’t long before foreign hostile powers stole the concept – though they tried to hide that fact by referring to G’rass as “a monocotyledonous green plant of the family Poaceae“. The Emperor tried to have their unscrupulous claims that G’rass wasn’t Chinese intellectual property thrown out at a WTO hearing, but lost due to a conspiracy against China.

China – Leading The Way Since 2991BC

7 Responses to “It’s [Fact] Friday!”

  1. justrecently said

    I’m buying that shit. *puff* They sold it to poor Mexican migrants who then flooded America with it.Lin Zexu, umm, Harry J. Anslinger, fought a heroic war in defense of the motherland’s public health. And the war on drugs *puff* goes on. NO PASARáN!

  2. serdolik said

    As speak in Russia: ” Where do not throw – everywhere a wedge. ” Here, recollected, at us that, at Russian that is whether than to be proud? Everyone who and something have thought up or have invented, but it – not at us in Russia… Horror! How further to live? Even balalaikas and nested dolls – and it too cleanly Chinese inventions…

  3. Meursault said

    True story: I was once asked by the sales manager of a factory I visited in Shandong whether the UK had grass or not. He thought only China had grass because the word he used for grass was Chinese so he couldn’t see how other countries would know about it. I wish I was making that up.

  4. MyLaowai said

    Unbelievably, some people have accused me of just making this shit up!

  5. serdolik said

    I do not think, that it is necessary so to experience… Well happens and happens – that now?

  6. Wow this is so interesting to me! Thanks for sharing!

  7. serdolik said

    It is not necessary to gratitude – always at your service… Come to us more often, can too something write… Singapore wonderful city!

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