Wo Shi Laowai – Wo Pa Shui

This Blog was Invented in Xi'an 5,000 Years Ago

Anatomy of a Phone Call

Posted by MyLaowai on Friday, May 15, 2009

[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…

The owner of the mobile phone stares at it, unblinking, fascinated at the strange sound it is making, awestruck at the thought of this small piece of Hello Kitty-decorated plastic making such a strange and unexpected noise.

[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…

A new thought works it’s way out of the depths of his mind, racing across his consciousness with the speed of a glacier: Could this be a ‘phone call’? For me?

[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! –]

“Wei? Wei?”

He pauses. A voice inside the device is saying the same thing back to him. This must surely be witchcraft. He’d better shout loudly at it to keep the demons away.

“Wei? Wei? Wei?”

Just a moment, the voice said something else this time. Better shout even louder.

“Shenma? Wei? Wei?”

And now the voice is asking him a question. How peculiar! Time to really shout.

“Arggh! Arggh! Shenma? Wei?”

Enough of this, time to dream of lunch again. He puts the phone back in his pocket.

[Five minutes pass…]

[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…
[Ring! Ring!]…

The owner of the mobile phone stares at it, unblinking, fascinated at the strange sound it is making, awestruck at the thought of this small piece of Hello Kitty-decorated plastic making such a strange and unexpected noise…

090515-Wei-Wei-Wei

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4 Responses to “Anatomy of a Phone Call”

  1. Hunxuer said

    Chinese phone call (male answerer)

    [ring ring ring ring ring ring ring]: answer

    ungh?

    uhhhh…uhhhh…mmmm…un….uhh…uhhhh….uhhhhh…uh uh uh

    [hangs up: click]

  2. justrecently said

    Looks pretty realistic… But between two tries to call, only thirty seconds would pass.

  3. MyLaowai said

    I know the post was entitled ‘Anatomy of a Phone Call’, but it could just as easily been entitled ‘A Excerpt From The Life Of A Grunting One’, without losing any factual accuracy.

  4. MyFenwai said

    ITT: albino niggers so butthurt about the host country they parasitize that they even whine about their phonecalls.

    chinese people should start pushing honkey pieces of shit into subway tracks.

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