Wo Shi Laowai – Wo Pa Shui

This Blog was Invented in Xi'an 5,000 Years Ago

Ching Ching, Qingdao

Posted by MyLaowai on Saturday, November 23, 2013

Guest Post
Got a gas problem? Too many pickled eggs maybe?

One of the most dangerous places on the face of the planet has to be Qingdao, or Tsingdao, depending on which epoch you choose to come from. [Ed: It’s Tsingdao, unless you come from Peking]

Most expats in China would probably recognize the latter, not the former, due to their daily consumption of the watered-down rats-piss exported from the German settlement that passes as beer everywhere else.

For all you others: the place where the Olympic sailing races were held.

Yeah – the algae bloom landing zone.

Before this week, it was dangerous enough. China’s nuclear submarine base is but a few Km north under the mountain that drove many Chinese emperors to send their subjects to Korea in search of the mystic floating islands that can be viewed from Penglai pavilion (Mirage).

Oh yes, that place. The one that had the massive oil slick from Chinese-quality offshore oil drilling. Mmmm. One of the most unhealthiest beaches in the world. No golden sand. No waves. Plenty of pollution. But really good beer.

Whoa. Hang on. Can we derive a causative effect here? Qingdao is an ongoing cluster-fuck, and also has (locally only) some of the best beer in China.

Yes, this week, an oil pipeline blew up. Where? Under a main road. WHAT THE FUCK? Which country in their right mind places a major oil pipeline from the drilling site to the refinery UNDER A MAIN ROAD? Let alone the residences, businesses etc it also passes under.

China. land of the long yellow shortcut.

– Da Bizzare

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2 Responses to “Ching Ching, Qingdao”

  1. Da Bizarre, are you from New Zealand by any chance? I only ask due to your use of the phrase “land of the long yellow shortcut”.

  2. penguincadi said

    All above, did Snowden’s former colleagues found out that you are all assholes?

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